Perhaps there is some love hidden deep within the relationship, but it’s not what’s showing up in this whirl. Here’s the dance: He feels like a piece of sh*t. She can’t bear his suffering. He goes down to the depths of pain and she ties her rope to him in hopes of saving him from […]

When I think of celebrating Mother’s Day, I think of having my children here at home with me, spending time together as a family. That would be the perfect gift.   Or would it?   On the one hand, being with my kids and doing something special, like going on a bike ride together on […]

“Practice dying.” That is family therapist Carl Whitaker’s advice on living fully (he was quoting Plato). Throughout the 25 years that quote has been posted on my bulletin board, I’ve revised my interpretation of it from time to time. After being so ill once that I literally did have one foot in the grave, I’ve […]

  Yes, yes, I “get” that attachment leads to suffering; that “letting go” is what it’s all about.  Letting go of the past, letting go of the yet-to-be, being right here right now is where it’s at.  And, I even believe that to be true.  However, we are branded with a navel at birth.  That […]